The majority of men allow women to walk all over them. They tolerate shitty behaviour because they think it will help them get laid. When a girl is disrespectful toward them, they say nothing and try and maintain that “cool”, “fun guy” vibe by pretending like nothing even happened. They try and come up with a witty remark or two, dismiss her behaviour and then just carry on as though nothing happened.
Every time you allow someone (man or woman for that matter) to treat you poorly and do nothing about it, the more your self-esteem suffers and in turn your value as a man declines. When you hold people to higher standards they will treat you better and work harder for your approval.
Let’s look at an example; if you are in a boardroom meeting and one of your co-workers cuts you off mid sentence regarding something important you wanted to share. You have a couple options…
Option #1: You say nothing, look down at your desk and allow your co-worker to derail your thought/idea as though nothing happened.
Option #2: You can politely (remember you are in a work environment and need to maintain your reputation at all costs) say, “Actually John, do you mind if I finish that thought quickly. I have a couple more points and then I’d love to hear your feedback.”
Which option do you think commands more respect and authority? My money is on the second option. Whether you are talking to a woman or doing business in a work environment, allowing people to walk all over you is a habit that will result in people not respecting you. This does not mean you need to be rude, aggressive and confrontational all the time. In fact, that would probably hurt your reputation just as much as allowing people to walk all over you. You just need to enforce your personal boundaries with a “take it or leave it” attitude.
Let’s look at an example from the dating world that is all too common (unfortunately)…
You are talking with a girl. Maybe you are out for coffee, on a date or just hitting it off at the bar. She starts being very short with you, giving you one word answers, not putting much effort into the conversation. She is texting on her phone, ignoring you, etc… (you get the picture). Again you have a couple options with how to respond…
Option #1: You do nothing. You try to continue the conversation as if nothing happened to communicate you are that “cool” easy going guy.
Option #2: You tell her in a serious (but not butthurt) tone to cut the shit. “Is there something important distracting you? Or are you just one of those girls who can’t hold a conversation without checking their phone every two seconds?” Or you can say something like, “I thought you were a cool girl, but if this is how you act around someone we can just end this now”.
In both of the above scenarios, the second options are the ones the communicate high-value. A man who does not tolerate second rate behaviour from the people he spends time with. He commands that people respect his personal boundaries or they don’t get to interact with him at all. It’s simple.
Try putting this into practice in your every day life. Think back to situations in the last week, month or even year when you felt as though someone did something that bothered you and you did nothing in an attempt to be non-confrontational and agreeable. Outline what your personal boundaries are and act on them in an authoritative yet respectful manner.